Is it even possible? To be able to manage stress every day in our lives, or before they even come?
If you ever wondered whether quick fixes work better as they’re usually easier, you might want to reconsider and look for long-term changes as well, as working on both ends has better chances of helping you live a good life.
FACT: STRESS IS, AND WILL ALWAYS BE PART OF OUR LIVES.
Yes, it’s part of us, and part of what biologically makes us. It’s a biological reaction we can never lock out. It’s been there and always comes knocking when we cannot meet life’s current demands.
WHAT CAN WE DO?
Instead of trying to get rid of the stress in our system, because it literally won’t ever happen, we just have to learn to “keep” the stress levels at “NORMAL LEVEL”.
The stress that we feel only happens when our stress levels are above what our bodies naturally need.
SO HOW DO WE KEEP OUR STRESS LEVELS NORMAL?
From my own experience of tragic deaths happening together with work overload and life overload in general, the days when I was lost… and as a Certified Stress Strategist and a Doctor, here are the things that can really help you:
1. THE HERE AND NOW
“What does that even mean?”
The Here and Now is a skill really helpful to use during raging stress levels. It simply means keeping your focus “at the very moment” you’re in, like instead of thinking the what ifs after the fact, you just pause, take deep breaths, and take a good look at WHERE YOU’RE AT.
Doing so prevents you from having anxiety or panic attacks.
Some people have this naturally within them, but to some, it takes a lot of practice.
Starting slowly with daily practice of 3-5 minutes of mini-meditation or breathing exercises, and then slowly increasing the time to 10 minutes and so on, helps.
2. THE LONG TERM
Focusing on the here and now is what can help you the moment you’re experiencing stress. But when you have calmed down, you must also get to the “root cause” of your stress.
What triggered you? What stressed you out? Is there something you can do about it to change it? Are there necessary changes you can make in order to avoid the trigger long-term, or forever if it can be controlled?
Getting to the root cause or the trigger, and making changes so that the trigger doesn’t often happen, will help you avoid the same experience again.
THE LONG-TERM TOOLKIT
As I mentioned stress is and will always be part of our lives, I also have seen a pattern and the 3 things that matter in your long-term toolkit.
Mindset: Are you mentally prepared to make the changes you need to make? Because if you’re not, you won’t act on it.
Energy: One key thing in preventing attacks is living healthy, as it’s a good source of energy. We know how draining it is for our energy to deal with stress.
Your External Platform: You have a world outside your body, and it matters in the long term. Keep good acquaintances, those that are mentally and emotionally healthy for you, not an additional cause of stress.
WHAT THE NEUROSCIENCE SAYS
Neuroscience is clear: We are wired to be mono-taskers, Our brain cannot effectively concentrate on more than one thought at a time, and it better be an active thought by you than an amygdala hijack moment. After that micro-rest, you will feel calmer and more effective.
Hence, the here and now or the “at the moment” actions mentioned above, as it helps in resting your brain from your problem for a few seconds..
And it doesn’t even cost a penny! You just have to see the clearer, bigger picture – then when calm enough, tackle the root cause.
And don’t forget about…
INCREASING YOUR ENERGY
Increasing your energy, or raising your potential capacity is necessary because with more energy, you’ll be able to do more without getting stressed.
But if it’s just too much… Don’t forget the practical tips too, such as:
Delegating tasks/outsourcing
Sleeping, eating, & exercising for health and happy hormones
SOUNDS ALL EASY, UNTIL YOU NEED TO ACTUALLY DO THEM
It all sounds so easy, doesn’t it? But then why is it hard to do it consistently?
BONUS
Try journaling.
Yes, maybe play some music in the background and just start writing things down.
Writing helps you to be able to reflect more, plan more, and even release more. Jotting down things that stress you out, your goals, where you’re currently at, your action plan, and your emotions…
“Sleep is for the week”, “Who needs sleep when you have coffee”, “I have many things to do, 5-6 hours of sleep is enough for me”– let’s stop patronizing these ideas, they’re not good for our bodies and never good for our health.
But how many hours of sleep do our bodies really need?
HOURS OF SLEEP PER AGE
0-3 months: up to 18 hours
4-11 months: 12-15 hours
1-2 years old: 11-14 hours
3-5 years old: 10-13 hours
6-13 years old: 9-11 hours
14-17 years old: 8-10 hours
18-25 years old: 7-9 hours
26-64 years old: 7-9 hours
65+ years old: 7-8 hours
The above is a guide or a framework we can use as a guide to how many hours of sleep we need according to our age.
But, it’s important to remember that like in everything else, when it comes to sleep…
THERE IS ALSO NO ONE SIZE FITS ALL SOLUTION
But how is that, if the sleep hours are clearly stated?
My explanation here would be simple. Our everyday life doesn’t look the same, so one person might be needing to do too many strenuous activities, forcing the body to need MORE rest than normal – you get the point.
So…
HOW DO YOU KNOW IF YOU’RE GETTING ENOUGH SLEEP?
Well, it’s time you reflect and ask yourself every time – or have a journal or some sleep tracker. When you wake up and you feel good, track how many hours of sleep you had, and when you wake up feeling tired… also track how many hours of sleep you had.
Recognize your own body’s pattern and listen to what it’s telling you. If you feel tired every day even after sleeping 7 hours, then maybe your body needs 8. And if you feel good and energized, then try practicing sleeping that right amount.
IT’S IMPORTANT TO REMEMBER…
We have to complete all 3 stages of sleep in one night: Light, wherein our eyes are closed but still too easily to be woken up, REM, which happens after about 90 minutes of falling asleep, where our eyes still move (rapid eye movement) while closed and where most dreams occur, and Deep sleep, where our brain waves have slowed down and it’s harder to wake us up.
And yes just in case you’re wondering, it’s also normal to wake up several times during the night. Just don’t do anything that can disrupt your melatonin like checking your phone or something to not make it hard for yourself to get back to sleep.
THE RISK OF SLEEPING LESS & SLEEPING MORE
Studies show that sleeping less than 6 hours a day increases the risk of Alzheimer’s, heart & blood vessel illnesses, and some kinds of cancer, and obesity for the younger ones.
On the other hand, sleeping more than 9 hours increases the risk of some types of cancer too. Which means… The safest thing to say is at about 7-8 hours of sleep every day, to have the lowest risk of getting these illnesses.
IMPORTANCE OF GETTING THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF SLEEP
Aside from being on the safer side of all illnesses… sleep has so many positive effects so we must keep up with our brains, their functions, and their processes.
Scientists have also shown before that when we sleep, some kind of cleaning process happens in our body, like getting the “waste” products out of our body.
TO SUM IT UP
Wrapping it up, and feeling what works for your body’s needs while sticking to the framework as a guide… is our safest bet to getting the right amount of sleep our body needs.
It’s not every day we get a good night’s sleep… sometimes even after sleeping a complete 8 hours, we wake up feeling bad. So, how do we make sure we get a good night’s sleep?
HAVING A BEDTIME RITUAL
“Okay, time to go to sleep!”
Here’s a question for you, sleepy head…
Do you usually prepare before bedtime or do you just rush into bed, close your eyes and wait for the sandman to come?
If you say rushing… Science shows that for most people the best is to prepare for sleep by winding down, at least by making that last hour different from your rushed everyday time.
So yes, a bedtime ritual…
THE WRONG WAY…
Many people, many, many people watch TV right before bed, thinking it’s their way of “winding down”…
Well, kudos for at least recognizing the need to wind down. However, If this is you, I also feel the need to tell you that studies show that turning the tv on before bedtime disrupts sleep cycles as anything that stimulates the brain before bed may be detrimental to one’s ability to fall asleep.
If that works for you with no issues at all, great! But for those who don’t…
HERE ARE A FEW GUIDELINES TO STICK TO
Take an hour before going to wind down and make it a ritual – the same every evening so that your brain will eventually recognize it as a signal to bedtime.
SOME GOOD THINGS TO TRY
Taking a quick hot shower
Taking a hot shower hours before bed helps in reducing our inner body’s temperature, which helps in making us fall asleep at night. We can also put on some thick socks and get our hands warm, then just relax in a dimmed-lit room after showering.
Avoiding too much movement
No hard exercise before bedtime, or anything that can stimulate happy hormones. That won’t make us feel sleepy, right?
Instead of going for the hard workout, opt for soft yoga and stretching, to feel relaxed in preparation for bedtime.
Diving into your book before sleep helps you feel relaxed – as long as you don’t choose exciting, or hardcore thriller books that will give you the opposite effect.
Playing some mellow music
There is no question about music’s magic, ever. Choosing the right music does wonders, all the time – even if it’s for getting sleepy.
Those are the good things I personally can recommend, and in case you’re wondering where the alcohol goes in the list…
We’re talking about getting a good night’s sleep – not getting the “sleepy” feeling because yes, the right amount of alcohol can make you sleepy, but it doesn’t give you a good restorative sleep.
So if you want a good resting sleep, avoid alcohol just as you would avoid screen as it suppresses our sleep hormones melatonin.
So to answer your question, yes – choose the soft, boring, relaxing activities to wind down and wake up feeling refreshed the day after.
Sleep – a very basic activity in life and very important for better health, wellness, and even for the business.
It is a basic function regulated by our internal clocks or the circadian rhythm.
The circadian rhythm, also known as our body’s 24-hour “internal clock” that controls our body’s sleep-wake cycle, is set by biology.
It’s true that our internal clocks naturally change a bit as we age, but we still need to adjust to the rhythm we are born with.
If we violate the clocks, by staying up when they tell us to sleep, they will get out of rhythm and that is when we feel out of rhythm, that’s feeling sick.
Just think of a day after you had too little sleep… you feel drowsy and become a slow thinker.
Guess what? That happens after just one night out of rhythm.
Regardless of your perfect bedtime, the sleeping hours are important as there are consequences to face for getting inadequate sleep.
Repeatedly inadequate sleep results in a lot of problems, including, but not limited to: obesity, blood pressure increase, higher risk of cardiovascular disease, the risk for stroke and diabetes, slow memory recall, and a whole lot more.
These consequences aside from being bad for the health are also bad for the business. You couldn’t be hustling with your business if you are already too unhealthy or forgetful to do so.
THE SOLUTION
Now that we know the risks, let us discuss the solutions.
How do we get enough sleep with better quality?
First, avoid caffeine and cigarettes when it’s near sleeping time. These are stimulants and we don’t want to have much active brain stimulation if we’re gonna sleep.
Next, avoid drinking alcohol late at night. Alcohol indeed makes you feel drowsy and sleepy, but too much of it makes your sleep pattern disturbed so even though you quickly fell asleep because of drinking, you won’t get your sleep in the right order. Wonder why you wake up feeling tired even after sleeping for long hours? Bet now you know the answer.
And third, is to engage in daily physical activity as it helps the body rest and sleep better at night.
Even just 30 minutes of brisk walking will do but remember not to have the heavy physical activity done too close to bedtime so you’re not in the hype when you try to sleep.
OPTIMIZING THE SLEEP ENVIRONMENT
You can also achieve a good night’s sleep by optimizing your sleep environment, like avoiding bright lights or Television as the blue lights of those will block your most important sleep hormone, melatonin.
You can instead wind down by listening to soft music or reading nice books.
IMPORTANCE OF ROUTINE
Not everyone can sleep the moment they lie down. Some need an extra 20 minutes before falling asleep.
If you are one of those who need the extra time, use it to wind down and do it every day until your body gets used to it.
OBSERVANCE IS THE KEY
Do not forget to observe the time you go to bed, the times you wake up at night, the time you wake up in the morning and remember if you have had a good night’s sleep or not.
Maybe you can make notes about this for a week as a sleep diary. That will make you see the pattern with ease. And by seeing the pattern, you will easily know what’s going on and you can easily pinpoint the possible causes of bad sleep.
If you want to know more about how caring for yourself and managing your stress helps in elevating success, here’s a complimentary guide you can download.
Halfway into the first month of the year and with the celebrations past us, we are back to the reality of life – and most of our New Year Resolutions are – well, forgotten.
In most cases, that is a fact.
We generally feel elated with the idea of new year. We see new possibilities, set new goals, take on new opportunities, and even make all kinds of promises to ourselves – but then the moment we realize that we’re back into our daily lives, we lose track of everything; and since that is the life that we know, we find it easier to stay rather than move forward.
And just like that, our so-called promises, our #NewYearsResolution – disappears in thin air.
The question is, does it always have to be like that? Or perhaps, is there anything that we can do to stop the cycle from happening?
Of course there is one. Actually, there’s a lot; but this one is my favorite:
“RAISE YOUR STANDARDS – so you can turn your ‘SHOULDS’ into ‘MUSTS’.”
Now why, that out of all the possible things we can do, I chose this one? My answer would be simple – it’s because I believe that once you get to do this, the rest will follow.
Your standard is something that you set – something that you have the ability to control. You decide which level you want to be on.
So when I said ‘Raise your standards’, I meant that if you are stressed out, overweight, or you are a smoker, but didn’t want to be any of those – you don’t get to find excuses not to change. Because if you do, then that is the standard you set for yourself.
But where ‘MUST’ you start? Here are some steps that can help you:
Define what you want to achieve;
Identify how far you are from your goal;
List the specific steps you plan to take in achieving your goal;
Implement; and
Celebrate when you succeed – celebrate with everyone around you.
AND above all, ALWAYS REMEMBER TO RAISE YOUR STANDARDS.
Hi, Dr. Anika Sorensen here from the blog Ask Dr. Annika where we help stressed out business leaders to become the calm, healthy, good working leaders they always dreamed to be.
Today I want to talk about a client that I had two years ago because I had a reconnection with him the other week. My client is a man called Lars who is 47 years old and working in a middle manager position with 25 people in his work group. He thinks that is a little bit too much.
I met him two years ago when he asked me to help him and it was more or less a coincidence that we did meet in the beginning but I soon realized that he was on the verge of burnout. He was really going to suffer a health collapse soon if he didn’t do anything about his situation. So, I asked him if he wanted to do something about it and he sure did.
He had never told anyone else about this so, on the outside you couldn’t really see that he wasn’t feeling that well especially if you don’t know what to look for. He hadn’t even told his wife how bad it was. Even though, I guess she, from what I understood from him she did see but they didn’t really put that out in the open in the family.
So I asked him what was the deal, what was the thing that helped you? Why are you such a happy business leader today and your group is working so fine?
What happened? Why? What was the biggest reason? And he said:
“Well the first thing was that you asked me how I was, and for the first time ever I told somebody and it was good that it was somebody outside my own personal circle. I told somebody how it really was and after I had done that it was like a stone fell off my heart. I didn’t realize that I had been carrying this great burden for such a long time and it was such a big release when I had it out in the open, when I could hear my own words and when I could hear myself talk about it.”
“The next thing you did was you asked me where are you heading? I had never thought about that. Really, well, probably I have thought about it before but that was not the issue at that time. My only concern was how do I get away from all the things that I didn’t want to deal with. So I was heading away from things not towards anything. You made me realize that you have to work towards something and then the things that you don’t want, they will eventually cease because you don’t put your focus on it. You get what you focus on. So that was a really big change in my work with the work group. It was a real eye opener.”
“And then when we were on track I was a bit hesitant, I must admit, about saying what I was heading towards because you asked me to make a one year leap or a one year goal and I couldn’t really see that far.” He said.
We discussed and I said “You have to see where you’re going towards and what direction you’re going but you don’t have to see the end goal at first. You can take one step at a time and it will come clear.”
The next thing he said was; “you forced me to take care of my sleep, of my food and of my physical activity so that I would get some energy, and you were so right that the way to get the energy is that you have to take care of yourself. After a while I felt so much better!”
“Next I started to make some changes within my work group.” and he said “I especially remember one thing because you asked me what I think about all the people in my network and there was this guy in my work group who was really good at what he was doing but he was not my kind of person and I sometimes had a hard time with that, especially when I didn’t feel well myself. You helped me to see that and learn how to tackle that too. How to keep him doing all the good stuff that he does and at the same time I could be around him without really just worrying all the time, which helped me a lot. We did a lot more changes to many different things.”.
“I also made some changes in my personal life, and I still have my family.”.
So now two years later he was happy. Things were going fine with work and he was still in the same position. They have increased their profitability in his group to double and it is a happy group and he loves his work.
Like I said he still had his family and the family life was also so much better now two years later.
It was it was for me very nice to catch up with him. It’s nice to see that the things, the little things that you do with your life that they can make such a big difference.
If you want help with your situation or you know somebody else who needs help with this situation then feel free to reach out. Just click the link below and we can connect and see if there is anything I could do for you too.
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