It’s not every day we get a good night’s sleep… sometimes even after sleeping a complete 8 hours, we wake up feeling bad. So, how do we make sure we get a good night’s sleep?
HAVING A BEDTIME RITUAL
“Okay, time to go to sleep!”
Here’s a question for you, sleepy head…
Do you usually prepare before bedtime or do you just rush into bed, close your eyes and wait for the sandman to come?
If you say rushing… Science shows that for most people the best is to prepare for sleep by winding down, at least by making that last hour different from your rushed everyday time.
So yes, a bedtime ritual…
THE WRONG WAY…
Many people, many, many people watch TV right before bed, thinking it’s their way of “winding down”…
Well, kudos for at least recognizing the need to wind down. However, If this is you, I also feel the need to tell you that studies show that turning the tv on before bedtime disrupts sleep cycles as anything that stimulates the brain before bed may be detrimental to one’s ability to fall asleep.
If that works for you with no issues at all, great! But for those who don’t…
HERE ARE A FEW GUIDELINES TO STICK TO
Take an hour before going to wind down and make it a ritual – the same every evening so that your brain will eventually recognize it as a signal to bedtime.
SOME GOOD THINGS TO TRY
Taking a quick hot shower
Taking a hot shower hours before bed helps in reducing our inner body’s temperature, which helps in making us fall asleep at night. We can also put on some thick socks and get our hands warm, then just relax in a dimmed-lit room after showering.
Avoiding too much movement
No hard exercise before bedtime, or anything that can stimulate happy hormones. That won’t make us feel sleepy, right?
Instead of going for the hard workout, opt for soft yoga and stretching, to feel relaxed in preparation for bedtime.
Diving into your book before sleep helps you feel relaxed – as long as you don’t choose exciting, or hardcore thriller books that will give you the opposite effect.
Playing some mellow music
There is no question about music’s magic, ever. Choosing the right music does wonders, all the time – even if it’s for getting sleepy.
Those are the good things I personally can recommend, and in case you’re wondering where the alcohol goes in the list…
We’re talking about getting a good night’s sleep – not getting the “sleepy” feeling because yes, the right amount of alcohol can make you sleepy, but it doesn’t give you a good restorative sleep.
So if you want a good resting sleep, avoid alcohol just as you would avoid screen as it suppresses our sleep hormones melatonin.
So to answer your question, yes – choose the soft, boring, relaxing activities to wind down and wake up feeling refreshed the day after.
You probably have heard about daily journaling many times, as it’s a frequent subject of discussions about personal growth. The question is, why?
DAILY JOURNALING WORKS
Yes, if the question is why then the simple answer is BECAUSE IT WORKS.
Let me ask you a quick question:
“Do you journal?”
Have you answered yes? Great! Have you answered no? Maybe you must start trying.
Do you know what another answer we frequently get for this question aside from a simple yes/no?
“I know I should, but no I don’t.”
Interesting, right?
HOW YOU CAN JOURNAL AS A HABIT
Most people – at least in the business world, say that they know they should do journaling as a daily habit as it would be good for their business, but still end up not doing it.
I’d say…
The very first thing to do is just get a pen and a notebook, and start writing even without much thinking – just let your thoughts flow. Believe me, you’ll be amazed!
Also… a tip: Refrain from using the word “should”, as we know that when we use it, we most of the time end up not doing them, because of how the thoughts enter our subconscious. Instead, let’s tell ourselves: WE HAVE TO – so our subconscious won’t end up having too many excuses.
WHY SOME PEOPLE DON’T JOURNAL
Going back to what I mentioned, the answer here would be as simple as: They don’t know where or how to start.
Why? Because before they even begin to write they think of things like:
“I’m no writer”.
Or
“I feel like my thoughts are too complicated”.
But hey…
Let go of those thoughts because they don’t make sense in journaling.
In journaling, you don’t need to be a professional writer – that ain’t the goal of that. It ain’t not for publishing, yeah?
Same as if you feel your thoughts are too complicated… exactly why you must write them down! Know how things suddenly become so organized after writing them down and being able to clearly ponder? That’s also how it is in journaling.
So again, just let go… And just start writing. 🙂
WHY DO JOURNALING?
Journaling helps you organize your thoughts – helping you make more conscious decisions. It’s a tool to find YOUR WHY, sort your feelings, comes up with new ideas, discovers yourself and your inner being… and many more!
Plus, you’ll realize how much of a big help it actually is when you have something to come back to and reflect on. You’ll see your personal progress, you’ll see how far you’ve come by, and you’ll see things you still need to improve and work on.
TIPS ON WHAT TO WRITE
If you are a beginner or just planning to start journaling soon and looking for ideas to write about… Here are some:
1. Your Activities + Feelings
What have you been up to recently? How did you feel about them? What did you enjoy the most or what bored you to death?
2. Significant Events + Your Reactions
What happened today? Are there things that made you feel happy or sad? Were there words uttered you liked or didn’t like hearing? Were there sudden changes? How did you react?
3. Future Plans + Essential Steps to Take
What do you plan for yourself in the next 3, 5, or 7 years from now? What are the necessary steps to achieve them? Does the current thing you’re doing resonate with your future plans?
You can start with those 3 things for now, and see how they affect you personally. You’ll be surprised how those simple things can help make you realize huge things!
Also, make it fun! Don’t force yourself to sit endlessly long with your journaling… So if you get tired of it after 10 minutes – just stop without guilt. 😉
Do you feel like you’re often tired? Did you know that there’s a connection between tiredness and our mitochondria, as these are the membrane-bound cell organelles that generate or produce our energy?
Now you might be asking, how do we get our mitochondria to generate MORE ENERGY so we feel LESS TIRED?
Great question, as there might just be a recipe on how to get that needed energy boost.
RECIPE FOR GETTING MORE ENERGY
If you feel like you get tired easier than others (e.g. always falling asleep earlier despite doing less work, or not finding the energy to do more because of tiredness), then you might want to consider taking a look at your inner power station – your mitochondria.
HOW IT LOOKS LIKE
The tiredness would sometimes be so bad that it is restricting the patient in their everyday life… holding them back from the life they would like to live.
TIREDNESS HAS DIFFERENT CAUSES
There might be many different reasons for your tiredness – and some are easier to cure than others.
But everyone can do things to make them feel better.
In my work in health care, I see many patients searching for help for their tiredness. Very often that is a sign of something else, as tiredness is not an illness in itself, but a symptom, or a signal that there is an imbalance with something.
Still, another common explanation for energy loss is a hectic life at both work and at home often leading to an unhealthy lifestyle – you end up in a negative circle.
INACTIVITY & POOR DIET
Often, it’s inactivity and a nutrient-poor diet that leads you to a state of lack. You sleep too little, watch too much, and move too little as your eyes are always focused on the screen.
LIFESTYLE, NOT AGE, DOES MATTER
It is not about age or gender – it is about a lifestyle bringing your immune system out of balance.
A disturbed function of the mitochondria in the cells is a central explanation for this lifestyle tiredness. The mitochondria that we have in all our cells deliver energy.
They are like miniature power plants.
TIREDNESS CAN PROTECT YOU TOO
A new interesting theory is that tiredness is a protective mechanism for our health. It’s our body’s way of telling us to pause and take a rest because we need to.
So what are the things that we can do to help our mitochondria gain some balance in giving us the energy we need?
1. ADJUST YOUR DIET
One good thing to do is to adjust our diet to a mitochondria-friendly one.
Lots of greens, berries, and nutrient-packed food with high levels of vitamins and minerals – this diet is what the mitochondria love!
2. MIND YOUR EATING TIME
It is also important “when” we eat.
This schedule is based on 3 main meals a day – and only minor or no eating in between. We are not made for a constant energy intake, and it’s advisable to have at least a 12-hour long break from food intake between supper and breakfast.
Even better if it is more than 12 hours – I usually do 15 hours by the way. You just have to find your best version.
3. MOVE AROUND
Physical activity is also important to help the mitochondria stay in a good mood.
Doing it outdoors adds even more to the benefit. We can even say we need to get outdoors every day.
If you are not used to doing physical things just start with a daily walk of 10 minutes. It is good for your muscles, your lungs, and for your heart. It is also good for your brain to get energy from the light.
But for those of you who already do a lot of training, I will maybe have to warn you to not overdo it. Your mitochondria don’t want too much and you want to keep them happy. They need to rest – and so do you.
Now your mitochondria will cheer for you and be less tired – and so will you 😊
Why am I talking about this again and again – from different angles?
Because this is the basic way we function – there are no quick fixes and don’t complicate it – Just do it and Take care.
I guess you are like most people – sometimes you feel at the top when you wake up in the morning – and sometimes you are on a low; which makes you often wonder: “How do I consistently stay at the top when I wake up and start my day positively?”
WAKING UP TIRED
You wake up tired, and your head feels heavy even if you have been sleeping, still your energy feels drained. And since we need energy in everything that we do, we feel unmotivated to move if not fueled enough with it, at the end affecting our mood.
OUR ENERGY
Talking about energy – we can’t buy it or get it from anybody else. We have to generate it ourselves through healthy living.
But how do we get enough energy?
Our sleep, what we eat, and believe it or not – our physical activity.
I know what you could possibly be thinking, that we lose energy after physical activity. And while that’s true that we get tired by working out hard, doing it correctly on the other hand builds up energy.
HOW TO GET IT RIGHT
Physical activity, when done correctly and in the right amount our body can handle, helps in building up our energy. We don’t have to do those hard workouts if we do not want to, but just simply “move our body”.
7 DIFFERENT OUTCOMES
Let’s take a look at the 7 possible different outcomes. The goal is to get you out of your couch potato mode and help you find a winning activity for a daily good mood and energy.
1.Sleep
Sleep is NOT a waste of time contrary to what some believe – it is the source of life. During sleep, we do the “housecleaning of the brain” so to speak. Memories get organized, waste products are washed out, and we get refreshed.
This also means that…
If the sleep is broken or interrupted, and not giving you the rest you really need, you will still end up waking tired.
Where does physical activity come in?
Exercising soon before bedtime disturbs the sleep hormone Melatonin, pumps our blood flow, and keeps the “alert hormones” pumping so we’re actually doing ourselves a disservice.
“What about night workouts then, is it time to say goodbye?”
Well, workouts are always better in the mornings – but if only nights work for you, at least make sure it’s not close to your bedtime.
Tip: Slow movements like evening outdoor walks help in slowing down your system and prepare you to sleep, and starting a day with either a hard workout, a brisk walk, or yoga meditation helps in setting out a good day.
2. SELF-ESTEEM
Okay, relevance?
With low self-esteem, physical activities feel hard, to begin with. It can make you feel as if every movement you make is awkward – even if it’s not.
Until you finally decide to try THAT ONE TIME, and you feel great and proud of it. You can’t explain why, but it makes it possible to think of doing it again because it made you feel good for some reason.
It does so because the regular moving of your body rewires your brain’s perception of self-confidence and respect – and you now know you are capable.
So in the end – your chosen physical activity has helped your self-belief and you have grown in the eyes yourself, and if you look back, you’ll realize that that one move you were not so confident to take before, now’s actually a part of your daily routine. Congratulations!
3. Better Focus and Memory
Now that you have boosted your self-esteem, we can see other good effects of moving your body like helping your memory and focus, all because of the endorphins released that boost your mood and sharpens your mind.
Together with the improved sleeping and lowered stress that comes with physical activity, we get all these fantastic benefits!
4. DAILY ENERGY INCREASE
As we started off to tell – “WE” are energy. And that energy can become stagnant if we just sit still, so we need to move to release the energy to make us feel alive.
“How?”
Energy is created in our mitochondria – they are our power machine and they exist in ALL our cells. They work around the clock to help us stay alive – and they create, and create energy.
Tip: The mitochondria are dependent on food intake of good quality to function at its best – so beware of what you eat…
5. HIGHER STRESS RESILIENCE
Regular exercise lowers the cortisol levels in our blood, which is a great way to increase tolerance to our life stressors.
Exercise, even at low levels, releases chemicals in our muscles that signal our brain to change. These chemicals reduce anxiety and depression and boost moods.
Tip: If you know you get overwhelmed easily, regular exercise eventually makes lasting structural brain changes that make you more resilient.
6. MOVING AS MEDITATION
Fun fact… exercise can be a meditation in itself.
I talked last week about cleaning and textile work as meditation. This is in the same system. You might think of meditation as something you need to do very regulated – almost a bit secret. But it is not!
Meditation is basically “getting into the moment” – and can be done anywhere. Focusing on your breath is a central piece of meditation and that is what you can do when you do your chosen way of meditation.
7. LOWERS DEPRESSION
Exercising is proven to be as effective as antidepressant medications. When I am working in the health care clinic, I usually prescribe a 30-minute brisk walk to my patients as their first pill.
How does it work?
Well, exercise releases feel-good hormones (endorphins), and as they flow into our blood system in larger amounts while walking, it helps in suppressing our moody feeling and we feel positive.
SUMMARY
Physical activity has an immensely good effect on so many levels in our lives.
So, get out of bed, start building the new habit of starting the day with a brisk walk or any other physical activity, and your thinking, self-esteem, memory, mood, and sleep, and more will all win big time!
WHERE TO START
There is only one right time to start and that is NOW, so what are you waiting for….?
No matter your age, gender, color, or religion – it works the same for all of us.
The investment is in you – and it will benefit you until your last breath on earth. Live while you can!
If you tend to hold grudges, it’s time to learn to let go as letting go of your grudges lessens your stress in life and helps you achieve real happiness.
HOLDING GRUDGES
A grudge is when you have this constant feeling of resentment or ill will brought by the past memories – but in the end, up to no good.
Why? Because it constantly brings back all the negative emotions it has with it, and you feel like you’re back there all over again.
GRUDGES ARE TOXIC
Holding grudges is toxic, and at the same time – makes you toxic.
We, at some point in our lives, all have met people who deceived us, or hurt us in any way – and even after parting ways, we hold this anger or irritating feeling towards them. In the end, we get consumed by those emotions and we become toxic.
But let us face the reality.
Who loses when we hold grudges against anyone? US! Because we are allowing ourselves to lose our peace of mind from the things that are already “IN THE PAST”.
GRUDGES ARE UNHEALTHY
It’s both physically and mentally unhealthy for us to hold grudges. Grudges are like bottles full of our anger and remorse. Now when that bottle opens or breaks, we explode – and when we explode, we tend to suddenly forget what taking care of ourselves looks like.
WHY MUST WE NOT HOLD GRUDGES
If I’m going to look at some of the MANY reasons why we MUST not hold grudges… Here are my favorites:
It makes us stuck, not being able to move on.
Who wants this, right? As much as possible, we want to leave the past as it is – especially when it’s awful. But in all honesty, how are we going to do that if we can’t let go of our baggage?
It can still hurt us, BAD.
As long as we hold grudges, we’re allowing whatever or whoever to inflict the exact same amount of pain like they did the last time – and just like that, we’re back at it again, making us relive all the negative experiences over and over as if we’re in a trance.
It makes you feel like you can never trust again.
You will find it hard to trust as all you see is either black or white. You think that only two things exist: the good or the bad, forgetting that somewhere in the middle, there are a lot of beautiful reasons and possibilities.
You take it out on others.
Admit it or not, the moment you see some sign you have painted on your head after what has happened in the past – you immediately assume that everyone you see this into will automatically do the same thing to you. Hence, making you distance yourself or unconsciously be rude to them and still justify everything as an “I’m just protecting myself” kinda thing.
Sounds all bad, don’t they?
WHAT YOU NEED TO DO
Now that we’ve seen all the negative things it does to us, let’s take at our options so we can finally learn to let go of our grudges:
1. Acceptance
It already has happened, there is nothing that we can do any more or could have done, so it’s just the way that it is.
2. Forgiveness
It is admittedly hard to forgive whoever has wronged you, especially if they have done great damage.
But if I am to share a secret with you… You do not need to force yourself to forgive them, because all you need to do is…
FORGIVE YOURSELF.
Forgive yourself for letting yourself get hurt by others, or allowing them to hurt you. Forgive yourself that you failed to protect yourself from them before. Forgive yourself that you were not able to do what you think now that you should have done, let it all go… and forgive yourself.
The moment you forgive yourself fully is in reality the moment you find it easier to forgive them.
3. Remember that we are all JUST HUMANS.
We tend to get mad and irritated when we forget that we are all just humans who make wrong or bad decisions in life. Maybe they have reasons, or maybe they had no reasons and they were just in bad shape making bad decisions – regardless, we know that we have those moments too.
Maybe we overestimated them, or maybe we thought wrong of them. Whatever it is, the truth is, the majority of the disappointment always comes from people who “fail to do what we expect them to do” or people who “do what we do not expect them to do”. Let go of these, and things will be easier.
4. Do not play the role of the victim.
Now, this does not sound good at all but hear me. You are the one in control of your life, so you have the power to decide what can make you happy, and what can hurt you.
It’s time for you to tell yourself, “these types of things cannot hurt me”, and live it. Remember, YOU have the power, so do not give them an inch of it.
2 Dimensions Of Forgiveness
Forgiveness has two independent dimensions:
Intrapsychic state (letting go of inner anger and resentment), and
Interpersonal act (telling the offending person “I forgive you”).
Now, which sounds better?
Remember to always choose 1, and that the number 2 is always optional. The Intrapsychic state is for your own peace of mind. If you do not do this, you will never have peace of mind. Meanwhile, the interpersonal act may or may not benefit you – depending on how you feel. If it makes you feel better saying it, go on but if it doesn’t because you never want to be associated with the person ever again – then you do not need to.
You can always forgive silently. You are not responsible for letting them know that you do, as much as you’re never responsible for helping them break free from their personal guilt.
RELEASE YOURSELF FROM THE STRESS
All these grudges do nothing to you except stress you out.
You may have a grudge against anyone, or against yourself – but whoever it is against, it’s important for you to remember that “THE GRUDGE ONLY HURTS YOU, NOT ANYBODY ELSE”.
So in reality, it can do nothing EXCEPT hurt you more, or stress you out more.
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